My Birthday, 2010

Today is my twenty-ninth birthday. Whew. Just saying it out loud kinda hurts a little. I always thought I was going to be at some magical, different place when I was almost-thirty - like....have some job with an important-sounding title, be dashing about solving the world's problems - I don't know, be in *charge* of something.

But as it is, I'm in charge of this little corner of the world. I'm in charge of my stories, of maintaining my friends and my relationships. I'm in charge of keeping my house going, and of maintaining a good, healthy relationship with the families I babysit for, toddlers included (especially toddlers - I find having a good relationship with them to be a lot like any other one: try to honor both your needs and wishes, have fun, and maintain good boundaries). I''m in charge of my writing, and the little community I'm growing of other writers around me. And I'm in charge of manifesting all this food in my garden, and a little corner of really pretty stuff all around my house.

I guess it feels very private, instead of some big, public life (filled with public accolades, etc.) that I'd been imagining, but it also feels very real. I think everyone fights very hard for the little pieces of peace of mind we achieve - the good times with friends, a decent job, a little corner of quiet tucked into a busy life. I appreciate what I've got.

So, as I look forward to a summer filled with work and writing and friends, I feel really grateful. As I look out into my garden, it's only June 6th and the garlic scapes are already curling twice around, there are little flowers waving above my potatoes, the lettuce is ready to harvest and there is already a tiny little eggplant forming on my deep purple ichiban. It's enough to make you grateful for another day like this one. Two years ago my Dad took me to a nursery on my birthday, handed me a hundred dollar bill, and said - "go wild." It was one of the best presents I've ever gotten - the beginning of my perennial flower garden, that comes up bigger and brighter every year. I also used his gift to buy myself my first rose bush - the flowers are pretty small, but they smell divine. They are blooming right now, and as I walk through my garden everything smells sweet and flowery....like I said, it feels like a good day to be alive.

To another great year,

Abby